The Thoughtful Game

When it comes to treats at the office, I often imagine myself to be a soccer player trying to get my ball past the other team. I dodge, I move sideways, sometimes I move backwards, sometimes I move forwards, and sometimes I get tackled. Up until now, I've always thought that my team had only one player – me.

It's nice then to know that this is not the case. I was approached yesterday morning by a coworker who wanted to know if it was okay if she brought treats in to the office. She knows I've been watching what I eat and has been rooting for me, but she also likes to bring the occasional treat in for the office. I was so very touched that she brought this up with me as she didn't want to impede my progress.

I told her as much and thanked her for thinking of me. But I did go on to say that though I appreciated the thought, I really don't expect anyone to act or eat differently because of me. In fact, I'd be mortified if someone felt they couldn't have something because of me. I encouraged her to bring treats whenever she wanted and that I wouldn't mind in the least. If I wanted to have some, I would. And if I didn't, well, I hoped it was understood that I wasn't being ungrateful.

As I dodge, duck and shuffle my ball along, around the treats and players, I know it's not a game that is easy but it is necessary. I can't expect everyone to dive out of my way or pick me up and carry me, ball and all, to the goal post. It's life, plain and simple, burly players, red cards and all. However, it's still nice to know the playing field isn't full of enemies and that there's at least one other player out there that doesn't want to take my ball away. Hopefully she knows that I don't want to take away her ball either.

Thirty-seventh Weigh-in

I'm down 2.4 lbs this week. Wow, what a jump! I'm hoping it's not entirely because of my lack of eating enough on a couple of days this week.

I'm also surprised to see I only have 25lbs to go. It's really hard to believe! I was going to set my next weight goal as my final goal, but I think I'm going to go back to baby goals of five pounds at a time. I've been buying charms (reminds me, I really must post pics of the most recent ones) but aside from that, I haven't been celebrating as much as I should be. I think now, more than ever, I need the encouragement to keep going!

Snow, snow, snow, and ski pants, too!

I'm super excited! We're going on a ski vacation this Christmas! After being taken for granted by our family for 13 years, my husband and I decided to take care of us instead this year. So, this Christmas we'll be spending four glorious nights on a snowy mountain with three of our closest friends. I booked it yesterday. Whoohoo!

But that's not what I'm excited the most about. I'm more excited because I will finally be able to hold my head up high when shopping for ski pants. It used to be that I'd have to borrow ski pants from my husband's work in the biggest men's size they had and still have them be too tight. I can't tell you how shameful that felt. But now, now I get to shop for my own snow pants and in regular sizes! Yay!

Thursday Confessional - the "I'm tired" edition

In the industry I work in, there seems to always be a deadline with not enough time or budget for it all to get done. Like the last time a big deadline came down, eating right has been very hard this week. Yeah, I know. I said I would plan more. And I planned to plan more! But it never quite happened.

Eating has been difficult, but at least I've been tracking. Unfortunately I've not been tracking on time - after a couple of days I went back and tracked the missing days and found that I hadn't eaten enough! Which is just as bad as eating too much. I'm working to remedy this. It's just that I'm often so tired that I don't want to eat in the morning or during the day. It's probably why I'm so tired - not eating enough!

On the bright side, this morning I pulled on what I used to call my "skinny jeans" (pre-WW) without undoing the buttons. They're too big for me now but I'm wearing them today anyways because I'm in desperate (emotional) need for something comfy.

Chocolate mushroom cake? Rolaid rolls?

Cakes, sweets, and chips could be full of mushrooms and heartburn medicine in the future.

• Read “Not that naughty but still nice” from the BBC

I don't know about you, but it sounds really interesting and positively vile at the same time!

Thirty-sixth Weigh-in

I'm down 1.2 lbs this week. Who would've thought that tracking your food and well, actually following the plan does work? (Said with a pointed look towards self.)

I really have been on a yo-yo this last month. I'll be good, I'll be bad, I'll be good again, and so on. I have to get it into my head that there's really no "off" time from this. It's a lifestyle and you have to live it and be mindful of it always. Ah well, at least I'm still taking one more step forward than I am back!

Subway Mini Subs

I'm not sure when this started happening, but Subway is now offering "Mini Subs." There's nothing special about them except they happen to be about half the size of a regular 6-inch sub. Since I was still hungry after my soup today, a small sandwich was just what I needed! According to Subway's site, they offer them in Tuna, Ham, Roast Beef, and Turkey. Excepting the Tuna, they're all 3 points*.

All in all, I'd say they're a great snack and perfect for a pick-me-up. I wouldn't go so far as to say it's a whole meal, but with soup, definitely. If you don't see them on the menu board, just ask. I only knew they carried them because I happened to see it on their website today.

* This is of course for a sandwich on whole wheat bread, lots of veggies, and no cheese or condiments. Visit Subway's site for detailed nutritional information.

Mid-week checkup

This week is going much better than last week. I've been a good WW'er and have been tracking my food. I'm also making more of an effort to plan meals ahead and follow the healthy guidelines as best I can. I even got my act together enough to make a crock pot roast this morning.

I'm also recovering well from the half-marathon. Fortunately, I only had minor aches and pains afterwards and each day since has been better and better. Today, though, I'm really really hungry and I wonder if it's also part of the recovery process. I ate a truckload of food (66 points worth, scary I know) on the day of the half-marathon and have been really watching my intake since then. Maybe I need to ease up a bit and eat more regardless of the amount I ate on Sunday?

Anyways, eating more today is definitely in order. I'm going to nip out for a Subway sandwich soon because the gnawing pit in my stomach won't let me concentrate. It apparently didn't notice the nice big bowl of beef, bean, and veggie soup I fed it an hour ago!

Ring toss

My rings have been going through phases during the weight loss journey. They'll be loose, tight or just right, almost as if the fat in my fingers has been shifting around my body trying to find a spot to hide. I did start to wear my engagement ring on my right hand as a precautionary measure but neither it or my wedding ring ever got to the point where they would slide off on their own.

But this morning, just as I was reaching for something on my desk, my wedding ring slid right off. I put it back on and found it stayed on, but just barely. I thought, "Gee, that's cool!" and then I had the idea of moving my engagement ring back over to see how it fits now. Well, my engagement ring falls right off now. Unlike my wedding ring, there's no slight resistance, it slides right off.

It's funny. I was just thinking that I was fortunate not to have lost any of my rings during this year's Thanksgiving preparations. The last time I lost weight two years ago, I lost my wedding ring when I was stuffing the turkey. Fortunately, it didn't fall in the cavity, but it was lost for a good hour before I found it in a kitchen corner.

Lest I lose my rings again, I've moved them both over to my right hand where they're still a bit loose but at least they won't go anywhere!

Thirty-fifth Weigh-in

There's a reason why I took so long to post my weigh-in. Well, aside from the half-marathon, hehe. I'm up .4 lbs. Whoops! But there's a good reason for that. I was eating for fuel last week. And, I had the big old Thanksgiving dinner the night before. So, I'm not entirely upset about it. I'm back at it this week and as I'm always fond of saying, each choice is a new opportunity!

EDIT: Of course, having just re-read what I wrote earlier this week, the gain most certainly was attributed in part to me being pouty and not tracking my food. There's a lesson in this to be sure. Dear Tiny: don't be pouty, track your food!

Medals for the heart, medals for the soul

I did something extra special yesterday. I achieved a goal I set for myself in May. I trained for it all summer. And yesterday was the day it all came together. When I crossed the finish line at the half-marathon and felt the medal placed around my neck, it was all I could do not to burst into tears. It was pouring rain, and my body was numb with cold, but I could feel the warmth of the medal hanging around my neck. My medal.

I was never athletic. I was always the kid who was picked last for teams. And I never had medals or trophies to adorn my wall or make my parents proud. But now, now I have a medal. And it's my medal. I fought for it and I won it. And I am so very proud of it.

When I came home from the event, and placed my medal beside my other two participation medals from other events this past summer, my heart swelled with pride. My soul swelled with pride. Though I am no longer the last, nor even the first, I am still a winner. And I have the medals to prove it.

TGIF (night)

Dinner is finally over. My family was a lot more stressful this year than most years. My mom didn't show up, my dad ate and left (leaving my husband to drive my stepmom and brother home which no one was expecting), AND my mother-in-law, by way of greeting, told my husband to shut my music off because she hated it. Though that was enough stress by anyone's count, that was only the tip of the iceberg.

Somebody save me from my family >_<

And save me from myself. I didn't do great food-wise, stress having gotten the better of me. I'm the type of person that eats for comfort. Even knowing the mantra "if it's not hunger, food won't fix it" didn't help. Ah well. It could've been worse. I made some pretty good choices in the middle of it all. For example, I filled half my plate with salad, only had a small amount of mashed potatoes and a thin sliver of pie. That erases all the extra ham, stuffing and bread I ate, right? Right???

But, if there's one silver lining, it's this: before I sat down to write, I was seriously thinking of making myself feel better by digging into the leftovers in the fridge. However, writing it all out has helped immensely. The family is gone and I'm sipping ice cold water from a wine glass. The leftovers might be good, but they won't fix anything.

Thursday confessional

First things first. I'm not sure that my Ham Plan™ is working out as intended. I bought the ham last night and it's the most delicious smelling thing ever. The scent of sweet hickory smoke just ooooooozes out of the package. It smells so gosh darned good that I'm salivating thinking about it. Focus, Tiny my girl, focus!

Second thing, I've been bad. It's embarrassing to say but I might as well get it off my chest: I haven't been tracking consistently this week. And I've been letting food control me instead of the other way around. Why do I do this to myself every time I hit a milestone? You'd think I would've learned from last time! But instead, I'm in a rebellious phase where *pouty look* I don't wanna track. *sticks out bottom lip*

But whining and stubbornness won't get me anywhere. Or at least whining won't. Being stubborn is one of those traits that can work for or against you. I can latch on like a pitbull if I want it bad enough but I can also flat out refuse to latch on though the ground is giving away. Ah, the mindset of a Taurus!

The rest of the week I'm going to work on that stubborn attitude and make myself do the things that I know work and are good for me. And I will track my food for goodness sake! So, enough with the whining, Tiny, and stay outta the ham!!!

Preparing for T-Day

If they had an award in high-school for "person most likely to be stuck cooking big family dinners for the rest of her life" I would've won it, hands down. In my family, holidays are important. It's a chance to sit down and be awkward together. In spite of this, or rather, because of this, my husband and I are always the hosts. The family dynamics are too long and complicated to go into, but suffice it to say, the family feels the most comfortable at our place.

This Thanksgiving, I thought I'd be able to dodge hosting duties because of the half-marathon on Sunday. Saturday we're resting and taking it easy, Sunday we're walking, and Monday is recuperation day. And after all these years of hosting, it'd be nice to have a year off.

Unfortunately, every time I try to take a year off, something invariably conspires to keep me from doing so. This year is no different [insert long story here]. So this is where I'm at: planning a last-minute Thanksgiving dinner for Friday night.

This means last-minute mental rehearsals because I didn't think I'd have to deal with eating a big Thanksgiving dinner with all the fixings! Fortunately, I still have a couple of days to get into the mindset and have already made great strides towards a hopefully guilt-free dinner. I'm serving ham instead of turkey. I like ham, but I love turkey. Specifically, turkey skin. I could eat the skin off an entire bird if given half the chance. But ham? I like it but not with the unending devotion I have for turkey. And with my weigh-in the very next morning, I have even more reason to be good at dinner.

I'll also be serving a lot more veggies than normal and may even try the WW recipe for Sausage, Apple and Cornbread Stuffing if there's time. I know stuffing isn't supposed to go with ham, but what the heck :)

If you've got any tips for a guilt-free Thanksgiving, please feel free to share!

Review: Starbucks warm breakfast sandwich

If there's one thing I would love to have every morning, it would be some sort of breakfast sandwich. Egg, bacon, cheese, yum. But, trying to follow this whole eating healthy thing, I wisely do not indulge in this desire. Or, at least not on a daily basis.

However, I still plan for the occasional sandwich. Which is why, when I espied a reduced-fat version of the new Starbucks breakfast sandwiches, I knew I had to have one. I'm happy to report that I found it quite good. Reduced-fat turkey bacon, reduced-fat white cheese, an egg that tasted like an egg but apparently has had its cholesterol magically removed and all served on a whole wheat biscuit bun type thingy. At this point you're either thinking it sounds absolutely horrible* or are desperately wanting to know what the points are.

Surprisingly, it has the same points value as a Bacon n' Egg McMuffinlicious. So I dug a little deeper to see which one was better nutritionally. Here's how they stack up:

	Weight (g)	Calories	Fat	Fibre	Protein
Starbucks†	159	350	11	4	20
McDonalds†	123	310	14	2	16
† Note that this nutritional info is only as accurate as the info provided by the companies and as my fingers can make them. Also note that Starbucks nutritional information varies according to region - and it can vary wildly! You will need to visit the Starbucks web site in order to obtain the appropriate nutritional information sheet for your area.

Disclaimers aside, you get more bang for your points value out of the Starbucks sandwich. Not only is it bigger, it has less fat and twice as much fibre. Still, it's not a low point meal, but if you've got enough to spare, you might want to give it a try!

* After writing my post, I wandered around the blogosphere to see what others thought. There's a number of folks who think poorly of the Starbucks sandwiches, with the reduced-fat version faring the worse. To those people, I say, "What do you expect? It's reduced fat!" And to my readers I say, "Take my recommendations with a grain of salt." Murphys Law says that I'm an anomaly and the only one who actually likes it.